Here is a lost episode from the X-Files...
We join FBI agents Mulder and Scully on a stakeout waiting for an alleged entity to appear...
Scully: Mulder, I can't believe I allowed you to talk me into joining you on this ridiculous stakeout.
Mulder: Keep your voice down, Scully; you might scare it away.
Scully: Mulder, we don't even know for sure that this thing exists much less that it's going to show up here.
Mulder: Sure we do. Forty-one years ago tonite on this very site the entity appeared. I talked to some of the locals to confirm this. The two witnesses that saw it wouldn't talk about it, but something scared the living hell out of them. I think we owe it to them and this town to find out what it is.
Scully: And I suppose this entity has a name?
Mulder: Absolutely...It's changed through the ages from as far back as the ancient Celts. Today we know it as "The Great Pumpkin".
Scully: (Rolls her eyes back and sighs) Mulder, you blockhead! There's no such thing as The Great Pumpkin..It's a myth.
Mulder: That's what the Government WANTS you to think. I believe that through DNA manipulation the Government created this creature for whatever reason, but it escaped and has been terrorizing trick-or-treaters for years since it broke free.
Scully: Skinner was right, Mulder...You really do need a vacation or a hobby or a life.
Mulder: Laugh if you will, Scully, but I believe that we are in the right pumpkin patch and at exactly midnite, this thing is going to fly through the air and leave us some toys. That will be the proof I've been looking for of it's existence.
Scully: Mulder, I'm missing Halloween for this?
Mulder: SSHHHHH!!! It's fifteen seconds to midnite!
(Off in the distance and in the shadows the entity rises from behind some pumpkins)
Mulder: There it is, Scully! There it is! Now do you believe me? OH MY GOD!!!!....
(Mulder passes out...)
Scully: (Pulls her pistol and shouts) FBI!!! Stay where you are or I'll shoot!!! I said stop!!!
(Scully fires six rounds into the entity)
Scully: Mulder!!! Wake up!!! I got it! (Smacks Mulder to awaken him)
Mulder: You saw the Great Pumpkin?
Scully: Saw it??? I shot and killed it, come on!!!
(Both with pistols drawn, Mulder and Scully make it to the entity and shine their flashlights on it.)
Mulder: OMG!!! It can't be...It just can't!
Scully: I'm afraid so, Mulder. The "Great Pumpkin" is nothing more than a dog. A Beagle if I'm not mistaken.
Mulder: Look at what it's wearing, Scully! It looks similar to a World War I Flying Ace helmet!
Scully: Why would a dog be wearing that? Unless of course the locals around here are into some really kinky stuff...
Mulder: My theory was right, Scully; except I believe this creature is a time traveler!!!!
Scully: I'm going home Mulder, and I think you better do the same before the owner of this dog has you arrested...Happy Halloween, Mulder!
(Fade to black)
Tags: Humor Parody Satire X-files
