"I can still hear you saying you would never break the chain..."-Fleetwood Mac
I don't know about the rest of you, but I've been seeing an increase in the amount of chain letters that are filling my inbox these days. While most of them are from people who know me...actually if they knew me they'd know I really hate receiving these things...some of them are from people who somehow got my e-mail addy and just felt compelled to share these things with me.
They usually go something like this:
Dear Friend: (Oh, pulleeeeze. If you knew me and we were friends you'd know my name.)
This is a letter of friendship that has already been around the world 1000 times. (At this point I'm feeling lucky already, I mean, it missed me the first 999 times right? )
You must send this to ALL your friends within the next 3 days, or bad luck will befall you.
They then go on to tell you what happened to the last poor soul who broke the chain...
...A vital body part will turn black and fall off! You'll have nightmares of seeing black cats reflections in broken mirrors while they're chasing you under ladders forever! You'll wake up to find a wild hare up your *ss! (No, that was no typo.)
Your neighbor next door will awaken you at 2am, naked, peeing outside your window, singing off key, the theme song from the show "The Love Boat" which will not only make you wonder how he got elected Sheriff; but will signal the beginning of many catastrophic events in your future. (Frankly, this last one would be enough to make me want to send the chain letter.)
The list of things goes on and on.
So I'm thinking of starting an anti-chain letter.
With the anti-chain letter, if you want good luck for the rest of your life, all you have to do is NOT send this to anyone.
What could be easier?
So relax my friends because good luck and high times will be all yours forever simply by me NOT sending this to anyone!
Be sure and NOT send this to anyone right away!
Michael
Tags: HUMOR JOKE LETTERS
